A Good Idea, But It Doesn't Work Here

Excitement was high here on Tuesday when the postal van dropped off a package containing a brand new "Scram Patrol" designed (according to the packaging) to "repel cats, dogs, squirrels and other nuisance animals." I performed systematic tests all week. The device did not bother birds either behind or in front of glass windows--which was great. But more importantly, it did not bother squirrels either-- even as close as five feet, unobstructed (the unit is supposed to have a twenty foot range.) Perhaps U.S. Patrol meant "other squirrels" in their press materials. "Squirrels" in this case means "squirrels that do not eat at your feeders" or "squirrels who look suspiciously like chihuahuas" (although come to think of it the neighbor's nuisance Chihuahua did not react to a Scram Patrol test, either.) I cannot endorse the Scram Patrol as a squirrel repellant. But if you want a banana-yellow laser pointer with a green trigger this is the gadget for you. I'm back to more traditional anti-squirrel techniques.